Khmer Magazines 2017



Q: Did you hear the slogan for the the new "Stealth Condom?" A: "They'll never see you coming."

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An old man approaches the window of a cinema with a chicken on his shoulder, and asks for 2 tickets. The girl at the counter wants to know who is going in with him. He replies, "Well, my pet chicken, of course!" "I'm sorry," The girl tells him. "We can't allow animals in the cinema." The man goes around the corner and stuffs the chicken into his trousers. He returns to the window, buys his ticket and goes in. Inside the cinema, the chicken starts to get hot and begins to squirm, so the man unzips his trousers so the chicken can stick it's head out and watch the film. Seated next to him is a woman. She looks over at his lap and is horrified. She elbows her friend Agnes and whispers, "Agnes, this man over here has just unzipped his trousers!" Agnes whispers back, "Oh, don't worry about it...you've seen one, you've seen them all." Madge says, "I KNOW...but this one's eating my POPCORN!!"

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Q: What is the difference between medium and rare? A: 6 inches is medium, 8 inches is rare.

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Q: Why does a blonde insist on him wearing a condom? A: So she can have a doggie bag for later.

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One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps his wife on the shoulder and starts rubbing her arm. The wife turns over and says "I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh." The husband, rejected, turns over and tries to sleep. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. This time he whispers in her ear, "Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?"

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Winnie and Piglet sit on the bank of the river and smoke dope. A crocodile comes out of the river: - Hey pals, let me have a whiff. - Get lost, oh green one! - Come on guys, just one! - Go %@~# yourself! So what would you do? Well, the crocodile swallows Piglet and sits in his place. Winnie, inhaling, is holding the butt out to Piglet and suddenly sees a crocodile. - W-ell, it seems enough for you, pig!

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Whats the difference between premenstrual tension and BSE? One's mad cow disease, the other's an agricultural problem.

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Q: How does a blonde prepare for safe sex? A: She puts on rubber based lipstick.

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Q: Why do men have a hole in their penis? A: So they can think with an open mind.

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One day there were two boys playing by a stream. One of the young boys saw a bush and went over to it and the other boy couldn't figure out why his friend was at the bush so long. The other boy went over to the bush and looked. The two boys were looking at a woman bathing naked in the steam. All of a sudden the second boy took off running. The first boy couldn't understand why he ran away so he took off after his friend. Finally, he caught up to him and asked why he ran away. The boy said to his friend, "My mom told me if I ever saw a naked lady I would turn to stone, and I felt something getting hard, so I ran."

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Why were men given larger brains than dogs? So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.

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Q: What is it that all men have one of; it's longer on some men than on others; the Pope doesn't use his; and a man gives it to his wife after they're married? A: surname

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Q: Why do women have tits? A: So men will talk to them.

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What did the egg say to the boiling water? "How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago."

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Q: Why did the blonde give up bowling for screwing? A: The balls are lighter, and you don't have to change shoes.

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Q: Why is a blonde like Australia? A: They're both down under, and no one cares.

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Q: What does pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common? A: Both can smell it but can't eat it.

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A man walks into a tattoo parlor and says he would like a $100 dollar bill on his dick. Well the tattoo artist laughs and says "I'll do it for free if you can give me one good reason for it." The guy thinks for a second and says. "Well one, I like to keep my money in my pants, two I like to watch my money grow, and three I want to see how fast my wife can blow a $100.

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Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a phone booth? A1: You need a quarter to use the phone.

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Q: How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony? A: It's not hard.

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Q. What does a woman's asshole do when she is having an orgasm? A. He is usually home with the kids!

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I was making love to this girl and she started crying. I said, "Are you going to hate yourself in the morning?" She said, "No, I hate myself now."

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Q. What's the definition of a Yankee? A. Same thing as a "quickie", only you do it yourself.

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Why do men masturbate? It's sex with someone they love.

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An old man in a nursing home awoke one day and trundled down the hallway to the community breakfast room looking rather forlorn. Ms. Smith, a nurse, met him in the hallway. She greeted him smilingly and asked how he was this day. Mr. Jones allowed that not all was well; in fact, his penis had died during the night. Ms. Smith knew that Mr. Jones was occasionally a little off mentally, so she merely replied that she was sorry to hear the bad news and went on her way. The next morning Mr. Jones was on his way to breakfast again but on this day he was dressed in a coat and tie, and his penis was hanging out of his pants. Sure enough, he met Ms. Smith whereupon -- although somewhat startled -- she calmly reminded him that the day before he had told her his penis had died and asked why it was hanging out of his pants. Mr. Jones replied simply, "Today is the viewing."

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