Khmer Magazines 2018



Kennen was having a drink in a saloon when his neighbor, Stakely, came rushing in. "Ah think somebody's stealin' yore pickup truck!" the man said breathlessly. Kennan ran outside, but came back right away. "Well, did yew stop him?" asked Stakely. "Naw!" said the redneck. "He was too fast. But Ah got his license plate before he got away!"

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Did you hear about the Omaha mother who got tired of putting name tags on her son's shirts, so she had his name legally changed to "Machine Washable"?

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Jim sees his neighbor out back building a bunker, loading in 75 gallons of bottled water, hauling in a gas generator and so on. "So, uh, I guess you believe Y2K is a biggie huh?" "Naw", says the neighbor. "Ah's jes' stockin' the bunker now, 'cuz if I did it any other time, people'd think ah's nuts."

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Did you hear about the stupid woodworm? He was found in a brick.

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How do you confuse an idiot? Give him two spades and ask him to take his pick.

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I can't understand the critics saying that only an idiot would like that television program. I really enjoyed it.

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What do Filipinos call Canada? Upper U.S.

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The Albanian planted lightbulbs in his garden. He heard that tulips grew from bulbs.

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An idiotic laborer was told by an equally idiotic foreman to dig a hole in the road. "And what shall I do with the earth, sir?" asked the laborer. "Don't be daft, man," he replied. "Just dig another hole and bury it."

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A stupid man was struggling out of his house with a big table. His neighbor said to him, "Hello, Harry. Where are you going with that then?" And Harry replied, "I'm taking it to the store to have it measured for a new tablecloth."

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What do stupid kids do at Halloween? They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins.

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Why did Silly Sue throw her guitar away ? Because it had a hole in the middle.

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Edney and Cole, two Ohio Edison electrical repairmen, were working on a blown house circuit. "Hey, Cole!" said Edney. "See those two wires?" "Sure," Cole answered. "Now just grab one of them." Cole grabbed one of the wires. "Feel anything?" asked his partner. "Not a thing," answered Cole. "Good!" said Edney. "Don't touch the other one or you'll drop dead!"

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A guy walking down a street one afternoon passes an old man sitting on the side of the road with a large sack. The younger guy says to the old man, "Watcha got in the sack?" The old man responds, "I got some monkeys in that there sack." The younger man asks, "If I guess how many monkeys you got in the sack, can I keep one?" The old man replies, "Son, if you guess how many monkeys I got in this sack, I'll give you both of 'em!"

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One idiot said to the other, "You know, there are really only three kinds of people in the world: those who can count, and those who can't.

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What did the stupid ghost do? He used to climb over walls.

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Did you hear about the Texan who moved to Oklahoma and raised the IQ level of both states?

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Henderson bought a new car and, after he left the showroom, decided to catch a movie. When he came out, Henderson noticed he'd locked the car and left the keys in the ignition. He telephoned the dealer. "Which is the cheapest window to break?" he asked. "You don't have to break any of the windows," explained the dealer. "I'll come right down with another key and we can open it together." "No, no!" shouted the new car owner. "I gotta know now! It's about to rain and I wanna put the top up!"

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How does a Russian Aeroflot pilot navigate? By reading street signs.

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Why can't the Philippines field an ice hockey team? The players all drowned in spring training.

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Loomis: Does your dog have a license? Fenton: Hell, no! I do all the drivin'.

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Did you hear about the stupid Kamikaze pilot ? He flew 57 missions !

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What do you call a stupid skeleton? Bonehead.

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Two Canadian guys, Mike and Rob were on the roof, laying tile, when a sudden gust of wind came and knocked down their ladder. "I have an idea," said Mike. "We'll throw you down, and then you can pick up the ladder." "What, do you think I'm stupid? I have an idea. I'll shine my flashlight, and you can climb down on the beam of light." "What, do you think I'm stupid? You'll just turn off the flashlight when I'm halfway there."

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A 9-year-old boy in Manassas, Virginia received a one-day suspension under his elementary school's drug policy last week - for Certs! Joey Hoeffer allegedly told a classmate that the mints would make him "jump higher."

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