Khmer Magazines 2017



Q: What will you never say about a banjo player? A: That's the banjo player's porsche.

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Q: What's the difference between an onion and an accordion? A: No-one cries when you chop up an accordion.

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Q: What is the difference between a banjo and a South American Macaw? A: One is loud, obnoxious and noisy; the other is a bird.

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Two violinists make a pact that whoever dies first, he will contact the other and tell him what life in Heaven is like. Poor Max has a heart attack and dies. He manages to make contact with Abe the next day. Abe says, "I can't believe this worked! So what is it like in Heaven?" Max replies, "Well, it's great, but I've got good news, and I've got bad news. The good news is that there's a fantastic orchestra up here, and in fact, we're playing "Sheherezade," your favorite piece, tomorrow night!" Abe says, "So what's the bad news?" Max replies, "Well, you're booked to play the solo!"

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When is the water in the shower room musical? When it's piping hot.

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Q: What's the inscription on dead blues-singers tombstones? A: "I didn't wake up this morning..."

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Q: What is the difference between a cello and a coffin? A: The coffin has the corpse on the inside.

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Q: What is the difference between a saxophone and a chainsaw? A: It's all in the grip.

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Q: How can you tell someone is a true music lover? A: When they even put their ear up to the bathroom keyhole.

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Q: How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Seven; one to change and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.

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Q: What is the difference between a banjo and an anchor? A: You tie a rope to an anchor before you throw it overboard.

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Q: How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb? A: None. The piano player can do that with his left hand.

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Q: What do lead trumpet players use for birth control? A: Their personality.

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1st man: "My neighbors were screaming and yelling at three o'clock this morning!" 2nd man: "Did they wake you?" 1st man: "Nah....I was up playing my bagpipes."

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Q: Did you hear about the drummer who locked his keys in his car? A: It took him four hours to get the bass player out.

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A saxophone is like a lawsuit. Everyone is happy when the case is closed.

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A tourist is sightseeing in a European city. She comes upon the tomb of Beethoven, and begins reading the commerative plaque, only to be distracted by a low scratching noise, as if something was rubbing against a piece of paper. She collars a passing native and asks what the scratching sound is. The local person replies, "Oh, that is Beethoven. He's decomposing."

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Q: What do you say to the banjo player in the three piece suit? A: Will the defendant please rise.

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Q: What's the difference between a chainsaw and an accordion? A: A chainsaw can be tuned.

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Q: How do you know if there is a drummer at your door? A: The knocking always speeds up.

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Q: What is the difference between a trombone and a trumpet? A: A trombone will bend before it breaks.

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Q: What is the definition of a major seventh? A: A violist playing octaves.

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Q: How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb? A: Twenty. 1 to hold the bulb, 2 to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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Q: Why did the Boy Scout take up the banjo? A: They make good paddles.

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Knock Knock Who's there ! Bass ! Bass who ? Bass the salt and pepper please !

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