Khmer Magazines 2018



A teacher was having trouble teaching arithmetic to one little boy. So she said, "if you reached in your right pocket and found a nickel, and you reached in your left pocket and found another one, what would you have?" "Somebody else's pants."

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Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: I was mugged on the way to school and the mugger took everything I had

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Teacher: In what part of the world are the people most ignorant ? Pupil: Hong Kong Teacher: Why do you say that ? Pupil: That's where the atlas says the population is most dense !

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What was King Arthur's favourite game? Knights and crosses!

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Teacher: What family does the octopus belong to? Pupil: Nobody I know!

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A college business professor could not help but notice that one of his students was late to class for the third time that week. Before class ended he went around the room asking students some questions about the day's lecture. Of course, he made sure to pick on his tardy pupil. "And who was it that developed the theories behind communism?" the professor asked. "I don't know," the student said. "Perhaps if you came to class on time, Mr. Reebs, you would know," said the professor. "That's not true," the student replied. "I never pay attention anyway!"

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The food in our school canteen is perfect. If your a bug!

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An ideal homework excuse Teacher: Where is your homework? Pupil: I loaned it to a friend, but he suddenly moved away

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Teacher : Why are you reading the last pages of your history book first ? Pupil: I want to know how it ends !

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What kind of food do maths teachers eat? Square meals!

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Teacher : Make up a sentence using the word lettuce ! Pupil : Let us out of school early !

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Why did the teacher wear sunglasses? Because his class was so bright!

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Mother: What was the first thing you learned in class? Daughter: How to talk without moving my lips!

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Dad, can you help me find the lowest common denominator in this problem please? Don't tell me that they haven't found it yet, I remember looking for it when I was a boy!

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Teacher: What's 2 and 2 Pupil: 4 Teacher: That's good Pupil: Good ?, that's perfect !

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Teacher: Can anyone tell me how many seconds there are in a year ? Pupil: 12 - 2nd January, 2nd February...!

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Little Monster: I hate my teacher. Mother Monster: Well just eat your salad up then dear!

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What do French pupils say after finishing their school dinners ? Mercy !

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A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, he said: "Now, students, if I stood on my head the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I should turn red in the face." "Yes, sir," the boys said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow shouted, "'It's because yer feet ain't empty."

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Teacher: I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of Pupil: Life imprisonment !

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The teacher was giving her pupils a quiz on counting. Jackie got things started by counting from 1 to 10. "Now, Fred," said the teacher, "you take over, beginning with 11." "11, 14, 23, 42, 26," said Fred. "What kind of counting is that'?" asked the teacher "Who's counting'?" replied Fred. "I'm calling signals."

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Teacher: If I gave you three rabbits today and five rabbits tomorrow, how many rabbits would you have? Jackie: Nine. Teacher: That's not right, you'd have eight. Jackie: No, Teacher, I'd have nine. I already have one rabbit at home!

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Art Teacher: The picture of the horse is good, but where is the wagon ? Pupil: The horse will draw it !

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Mother: "Why are you home from school so early?" Son: "I was the only one who could answer a question." Mother: "Oh, really? What was the question? Son: "Who threw the eraser at the principal?"

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Teacher: That's quite a cough you have there, what are you taking for it? Pupil: I don't know teacher. What will you give me?

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