Khmer Magazines 2018



Why didn't the dog want to play football? It was a boxer!

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A true story, according to the LA Times..... Coach Frank Layden of the Utah Jazz asked forward Jeff Wilkins, "Is your bad play due to ignorance or apathy?" Wilkins replied, "I don't know and I don't care!"

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Why did the goal post get angry ? Because the bar was rattled !

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Q: What's the difference between David Beckham and an airplane model kit? A: One's a glueless kit and the other's a clueless git!

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Manager: I'll give you fifty pounds a week to start with and a hundred pounds a week in a year's time? Young player: OK, I'll come back in a year's time!

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What is a runner's favourite subject in school? Jog-raphy!

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Where do footballers dance ? At a football !

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How do you stop squirrels playing football in the garden? Hide the ball, it drives them nuts!

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What's the chilliest ground in the premiership? Cold Trafford!

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After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, "Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty minutes ago?" "Yes," the golfer responded. "Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the course?" "Yes, I did. How did you know?" he asked. "Well," said the policeman very seriously, "Your ball flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver's windshield. The car went out of control, crashing into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn't make it to the fire, and the building burned down. So, what are you going to do about it?" The golfer thought it over carefully and responded... "I think I'll close my stance a little bit, tighten my grip and lower my right thumb."

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Why were the two managers sitting around sketching crockery before the start of the game ? It was a cup draw !

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Manager: Twenty teams in the league and you lot finish bottom ? Captain: Well, it could have been worse. Manager: How ? Captain: There could have been more teams in the league !

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Where do football directors go when they are fed up? The bored room!

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Manager: I thought I told you to lose weight. What happened to your three week diet? Player: I finished it in three days!

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Which insect didn't play well in goal? The fumble bee!

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What did they call Dracula when he won the league? The champire!

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Where do spiders play their FA Cup final ? Webley stadium !

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Why do grasshoppers not go to many football matches? They prefer cricket matches!

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What's the chilliest ground in the premiership ? Cold Trafford !

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Golfer: "Please stop checking your watch all the time, caddy. It's distracting!" Caddy: "This isn't a watch, sir, its a compass!"

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Which England player keeps up the fuel supply ? Paul gas coin !

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Why does someone who runs marathons make a good student? Because education pays off in the long run!

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The seven dwarves are down in the mines when there is a cave-in. Snow White runs to the entrance and yells down to them. In the distance a voice shouts out "Charlton are good enough to win the European Cup." Snow White says "Well at least Dopey's alive!"

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What does a footballer and a magician have in common ? Both do hat tricks !

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What lights up a football stadium? A football match!

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