Khmer Magazines 2018



Two cab drivers met. "Hey," asked one, "what's the idea of painting one side of your cab red and the other side blue?" "Well," the other responded, "when I get into an accident, you should see how all the witnesses contradict each other."

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Q: What will Bill's favorite retail outlet be after his economic blueprint takes effect? A: Everything's $100.

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What do you get if you cross a longhorn with a knight? Sir Loin!

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Q. How many line dance instructors does it take to change a light bulb? A. Five!...Six!...Seven!...Eight!

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Q: Why didn't the T-rex skeleton attack the museum visitors? A: Because she had no guts!

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Coleman moved to Wyoming and was sitting in the unemployment office applying for a job. "Have you any experience in coal mining?" asked the clerk. "Yeah, in Pennsylvania," he replied. "They're using that new safety lamp down there now, aren't they?" "Ah don't know, mister," said Coleman. "I worked on the day shift."

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Teacher: That's the stupidest boy in the whole school. Mother: That's my son. Teacher: Oh! I'm so sorry. Mother: You're sorry?

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Knock Knock Who's there ! Cass ! Cass who ? Cass more flies with honey than vinegar !

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Bad timing for an excuse Teacher: Why were you late? Pupil: Sorry, teacher, I overslept. Teacher: It's three in the afternoon!

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I took my son to the zoo yesterday. Really, did they accept him?

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A man walks outside to his car for work, when he notices a gorilla in his tree. He rushs to his phone book and finds the animal control number, calls and asks them to send over someone who's a gorilla expert. When the man arrives, he is carrying a shotgun, a chihuahua and a pair of handcuffs. The man says,''What are all of those for?'' The animal control officer says, ''I'll climb up in the tree, knock the gorilla down, the dog will bite him in the nuts and you must slap the handcuffs on his wrists.'' The man asks,''What is the gun for?'' The animal control officer responds, ''If I fall first, you shoot the dog!'''

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How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

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Q: How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs? A: She fell out of the tree.

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Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight? She wanted to get a dark tan.

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Doctor, Doctor I'm a burglar ! Have you taken anything for it ?

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Why was the racehorse names Strawberry Ice? He was a sherbet!

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I don't know what it is that makes you stupid but whatever it is, it works.

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Q. "Why do the commodes in Marine barracks have the cut-out type seats?" A. "So that if the seat falls while they're drinking, it won't smack them in the back of the head"

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1st Monster: What is that son of yours doing these days ? 2nd Monster: He's at medical school. 1st Monster: Oh, what's he studying ? 2nd Monster: Nothing, they're studying him!

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Martin had just received his brand new drivers license. The family troops out to the driveway, and climbs in the car, where he is going to take them for a ride for the first time. Dad immediately heads for the back seat, directly behind the newly minted driver. "I'll bet you're back there to get a change of scenery after all those months of sitting in the front passenger seat teaching me how to drive," says the beaming boy to his father. "Nope," comes dad's reply, "I'm gonna sit here and kick the back of your seat as you drive, just like you've been doing to me all these years."

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Did you hear about the pig's vacation? They had a wonderful time at Yellowstone National Park. They dressed up as bears and raided all the garbage cans.

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God looks down and notices that Adam is all alone while all the animals have companions, so he decides to create a companion for man as well. He comes to see Adam and says to him, "Adam, you are my greatest creation and therefore, I am going to create for you the ultimate companion. She will worship the very ground you walk on, she will long for you and no other, she will be highly intelligent, she will wait on you hand and foot and obey your every command, she will be beautiful, and all it will cost you is an arm and a leg." Thinking for a few moments, Adam replies, "What could I get for a rib?"

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What do you have to know to be a real estate salesman? Lots.

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Why does Dracula always travel with his coffin? Because his life is at stake.

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She's so ugly that when a wasp stings her it shuts its eyes.

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