Blonde jokes

Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM,
SCREECH,VROOM,
SCREECH?
A: A blonde going through a flashing red light.

 

Q. How do blonde brain cells die? A. Alone

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A wealthy investor walked into a bank and said to the bank manager, "I would like to speak with Mr. Reginald Jones, who I understand is a tried and trusted employee of yours." The banker said, "Yes he certainly was trusted. And he will be tried as soon as we catch him."

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Why did the burglar take a shower? He wanted to make a clean getaway

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Bill:"My homework is really difficult tonight, I've to write an essay on an elephant."? Bert:"Well, for a start your going to need a big ladder.."

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How do fish go into business ? The start on a small scale !

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What did the envelope say to the stamp? "Stick with me and we'll go places."

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A man brings his wife a glass of water and two aspirins. She looks surprised and says, I don't have a headache!" He says, "Aha!"

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On which day do monsters eat people? Chewsday.

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Q: What is the definition of a major seventh? A: A violist playing octaves.

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What did the astronaut see on his skillet? Unidentified frying (flying) objects.

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Customer: Give me a hot dog. Waiter: With pleasure. Customer: No, with mustard.

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Q: How do you recognize a blonde in school? A: They are the only ones who erase their notebook when the teacher erases the board.

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Q. How do you know a blonde has been using the computer? A. There is cheese in front of the mouse.

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End of the Week by Gladys Friday

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How does a pitcher walk a man in Burger Land baseball? He throws four meatballs!

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How did the cannibal turn over a new leaf? He became a vegetarian.

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Why did your sister refuse the gift of a Japanese car ? Because she'd never be able to learn the language

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Q) What's worse than raining buckets? A) Hailing taxis!

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The night before her wedding, the bride-to-be talked with her mother. "Mom," she said, "I want you to teach me how to make my new husband happy." The mother took a deep breath and began, "When two people love, honor, and respect each other, love can be a very beautiful thing..." "I know how to fuck, mother," the bride-to-be interrupted. "I want you to teach me how to make a great lasagna."

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Q: Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes? A: They're doing research on black holes.

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