Snowman jokes

Where do snowmen put their webpages?
On the
winternet.

 

What should a football team do if the pitch is flooded ? Bring on their subs !

Read more!

What happens when sharks take their clothes off ? They go sharkers !

Read more!

What is a whale's favorite TV show? Flukes of Hazard!

Read more!

Yo mama so fat she wakes up in sections!

Read more!

Some vampires went to see Dracula. They said, "Drac, we want to open a zoo. Have you got any advice?" "Yes," replied Dracula, "have lots of giraffes."

Read more!

How does a physicist exercise? By pumping ion!

Read more!

Where do footballers dance? At a football!

Read more!

What should you do if a vampire borrows your comic? Wait for him to give it back.

Read more!

Why did the tadpole feel lonely ? Because he was newt to the area !

Read more!

What is the best advice to give a worm? Sleep late.

Read more!

A golfer, playing a round by himself, is about to tee off, and a greasy little salesman runs up to him, and yells, "Wait! Before you tee off, I have something really amazing to show you!" The golfer, annoyed, says, "What is it?" "It's a special golf ball," says the salesman. "You can never lose it!" "Whattaya mean," scoffs the golfer, "you can never lose it? What if you hit it into the water?" "No problem," says the salesman. "It floats, and it detects where the shore is, and spins towards it." "Well, what if you hit it into the woods?" "Easy," says the salesman. "It emits a beeping sound, and you can find it with your eyes closed." "Okay," says the golfer, impressed. "But what if your round goes late and it gets dark?" "No problem, sir, this golf ball glows in the dark! I'm telling you, you can never lose this golf ball!" The golfer buys it at once. "Just one question," he says to the salesman. "Where did you get it?" "I found it."

Read more!

If a hungry shark is after you, what should you feed it? Jawbreakers!

Read more!

A psychiatrist was testing the mentality of a patient. "Do you ever hear voices without being able to tell who is speaking or where the voices are coming from?" asked the psychiatrist. "As a matter of fact, I do," said the patient. "And when does this happen?" asked the psychiatrist. "Oh," said the patient, "when I answer the telephone."

Read more!

Q: What's the difference between a horse and the weather? A: One is reined up and the other rains down.

Read more!

A businessman was having a tough time lugging his lumpy, oversized travel bag onto the plane. Helped by a flight attendant, he finally managed to stuff it in the overhead bin. "Do you always carry such heavy luggage?" she sighed. "No more," the man said. "Next time, I'm riding in the bag, and my partner can buy the ticket!"

Read more!

Waiter, I can't seem to find any oysters in this oyster soup. Would you expect to find angels in angel cake?

Read more!

What helps keep your teeth together? Toothpaste.

Read more!

Did you hear about the vampire who joined an orchestra? He stood on the roof and conducted lightning.

Read more!

How can you tell elephants love to travel ? They are always packing their trunk !

Read more!

First Spaceman: I'm hungry. Second Spaceman: So am I, it must be launch time !

Read more!