Women jokes

At a family gathering, husband began teasing his
wife
about how she always get her way. "Honey," she said to her
husband,
"when I get my way, that's a compromise."
"What is it
when I get my way?" he was quick to ask. She replied,
"That's a
miracle!"

 

Yo mama so stupid she stole free bread.

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yo mama so stupid..she sits on the t.v and watches the couch

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OUESTION: What is cosmetics? ANSWER: Cosmetics is a woman's means for keeping a man from reading between the lines.

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yo mommas so poor the roaches pay the light bill!

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Yo mama so short she can play handball on the curb.

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Q: How many Aquarians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Like, why don't you just get out of my face and stop asking me to do all your work for you? I'm, like, really totally sick and tired of you asking me questions.

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Yo mama so dark she went to night school and was marked absent!

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Yo mama so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone

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Yo mama's so stupid, she ordered a cheeseburger without the cheese.

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Yo mama so poor I stepped in her house and I was in the backyard.

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Yo mama's like the sun you look at her to long you will go blind!

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Yo Momma so black when she goes swimming poeple thinks shes and oil spill.

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Yo mama so fat her nickname is "Lardo"

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Starting his new job at the zoo, the eager young zoo keeper asked the Head keeper what he should do for his first task. "Go and clean out the aquarium" he was told. Arriving at the aquarium, he discovered that all the fish were dead. He rushed back to the head keeper and asked what he should do. "Throw them to the lions" said the head keeper, "the lions will eat anything". So the young keeper returned to the aquarium, picked up all the dead fish and threw them into the lion's cage. That done, he returned and asked what he should do now. He was instructed to go and clean out the ape house. Off he went and started cleaning. He was shocked to discover dead chimpanzees in the cage, and rushed back for instructions. "Dont worry" said the head keeper, "just throw them to the lions, the lions will eat anything". So the young man returns to the ape house and throws the dead animals into the lions cage. Returning again for instructions, he is told to go along and help clean up the insect house. Busy cleaning out one off the exotic hives, he notices that all the bees have died. "I know what to do", he thinks to himself "I'll throw them all to the lions, as the lions will eat anything", whereupon he brushes them all up and throws them into the lion cage. The next day, the zoo obtains a new lioness. The lioness is walking around the new cage for the first time, and starts asking the other lions what things are like here. "Hows the accommodation?", she asks. "Fine" comes the reply from one lion. "And whats the food like?" she asks. "Not bad" replies another, "yesterday, we had fish, chimps and mushy bees".

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Yo mama so fat when she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride HER!

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Your momma is so fat that her measurements are 26-34-28, and her other arm is just as big!

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Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras

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Your Momma's so black she got counted absent at night school.

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A Scotsman paying his first visit to a zoo stopped by one of the cages "An' whut animal would that be ?" he asked the keeper. "Thats a moose from Canada", came the reply. "A moose !!", exclaimed the Scotsman. "Hoots, mon, if that's a moose then they must ha' rats the size of elephants over there !"

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Yo mama so old I told her to act her own age, and she died.

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